Sears Tower Climb 2010

November 14, 2010 was the second year that I completed the Sears (Willis) Tower climb for Skyrise Chicago. I raised money in the climb that went to help Rehab Institute of Chicago.

The wonderful thing about RIC is that they help patients who have suffered severe injuries all over the world. This year I dedicated my climb to three women that I love that right now wouldn't have been able to climb all 2109 steps to the 103rd floor of the tower. My Mum, who had a total knee replacement a few months ago. My dear sister Teresa who had a surgery which has made her bed ridden. And my dear friend Anne who was recently diagnosed with serious lung illness which has limited her traveling.

I started the climb later this year and found this year rewarding. Most of the patients who have completed therapy climb later in the day. It was so wonderful to climb with those who have been able to come out of a trauma and learn to walk again not just walk but climb the stairs to the observation deck. I met an amazing 70 year old woman who had bilateral hip replacement and she made it. This was so inspiring for me to realize, I can accomplish anything as long as I put my heart, soul and mind to it.

When I stepped out onto the observation deck my eyes got tearful. To know that I was able to raise money to help those patients in need of rehabiliation services. As you step out medals are handed to you by patients. When I actually meet the individuals that I did the climb for I was felt so much joy and love.

I plan on doing this again next year. A very rewarding and wonderful experience.

To love or not to love that is the question or is it a quest?

Seriously, I am sometimes the biggest idiot in the world. I have outdone myself this time too. I want to laugh, cry and scream. Hit something really hard. Honestly, you all can laugh at me because I am a complete joke.

I met a guy that I really liked back in late June. Because I was scared to admit that I liked him, since I didn't want to get hurt I was aloof. I gave signs that I liked him however they were not big and straight forward. We had wonderful phone conversations and shared great insight and actually, I started opening up because I felt safe around him. He opened up to me and even admited to me that he felt more comfortable around me.

Catch he was dating another woman, I lived 2200 miles away. I went to visit him had a lovely time until she kept texting him and he basically gave me the cold shoulder. I won't fight for a man's love because I am a wonderful person and I shouldn't have too. Thus I told him to go after her when I really wanted him. Tried to date a few others but just couldn't I wanted this man.

The other girl thus dumped him because she is in love with another man. After three months of regretting not telling him how I truly felt about him, knowing that he stopped dating other women, I professed my feelings to him only to be rejected.

I knew that it would either be that he wanted to give us an effort or in reality he was the womanizer that I suspected and he never cared or liked me he was just using me. Thus I discovered that he had only been using me for his physical pleasure and had never liked me.

It hurts, I can't lie about that. I also wonder why I fell for a man who is incapable of love. I thought I saw a man who was capable of unconditional love but I was wrong. Maybe my man radar is broken or something.

In the last few days I have pondered, cried, pondered and realized that I am an amazing woman. I have a heart of gold. I am smart, beautiful and fun. No man deserves me.

Will I be missing out by never having a man to say "I love you" or to hear a man say "I love you". No, because I do have love. I have the most wonderful children in the world. I love them more than anything in the world and they reciprocate the love back to me. And then my beautiful parents and siblings who no matter how goofy or crazy I am they love me no matter what and stand by to support me through thick or thin. I also have the love of my dear friends who without them I wouldn't be the woman I am today.

Love, my life is overflowing with love.

Back to Nature

Today was so amazing. It was a very pleasant day, the sky was clear with the sun warming the earth with her bright rays of light. Warm filled the air.

We traveled to a suburban town called Wayne, Illinois. Part of the Illinois Prairie path runs through Wayne. About four weeks ago I went on a bike ride out there with my friends. My thoughts as I traveled in this highly forested area was how peaceful and blissful it was in this area. I had to take my children to this wonderful place. Thus we hopped in the car and drove there.

Exploring the forest perserve by foot was even better then when I rode on the paths on my bike. Plus I was able to take the kids of the prairie path into the beautiful meadows and truly get close to nature and our lovely earth.

We found a stream and a pond. The pond was amazing because we saw so many frogs. I became a child again. Javi, my darling son, and I tried catching some frogs. We weren't successful I had totally forgotten how fast frogs are. The joy on my son's face to attempt to catch a frog was priceless.

There were several garden snakes and we did try to catch and take a picture of two of them but alas they were much too quick for us. We did find a deceased mouse, frog and snake. Javi wants to go back to have a funeral service for each of the deceased.

It was lovely, breath taking and peaceful. A nice way to end the week or start the next week. I enjoyed spending this time with my kids and wish it hadn't ended.

To climb or not to climb

I spent five hours today rock climbing. What I enjoy about the climbing is the exhilaration of ascending the 60 foot wall and the descent. I like the danger which is minimal when you are not on an actual rock face and when you are on the rock face. It is the power of being able to conquer mother nature.

Today, I pushed myself to the point that my biceps, triceps and deltoid are aching. My extensor digitorum, extensor pollicis longus and extensor carpi ulnaris are still twitching. I at least wore my ace wrap on my right knee which I know has a lateral meniscus tear, however, the wrap has at least saved my knee today as I have no swelling. I know I am so pushing myself but this is my exercise, my joy and what keeps me going.

The reason for the blog is that I have found so much challenge and joy in climbing. My little obsession.

When I came home tonight, ate a bit then sat to relax as my body is not liking that i am pushing it. Decided to watch a movie and ended up watching a documentary called "Touching the Void" the story of Simon Yates and Joe Simpson, the only two mountaineers to successful alpine climb the Siula Grande in the Andes.

One thing I admire is that they actually climbed to the peak of the Siula Grande. They used the skill and knowledge needed to conquer the mountain. However, upon the descent Joe fell putting excessive pressure on his left leg causing the fibula to jolt up and bang into his femur causing a severe break. Simon tried to get Joe off the mountain after going over a huge ice ledge and making no progress, Simon thought Joe was dead and cut the 150 foot rope.

Luckily, Joe had fallen in a crevasse in a glacier and miraculuslly made his way down to basecamp and out of the Andes alive.

Brings me to my point, should we be climbing these high peaks? Everest has become the "tourist" mountain for unexperienced climbers. Look back at the 1996 disaster on the mountain in which two of the worlds most experienced mountaineers sacrificed their lives to save the unexperienced climbers who paid them to take them on the mountain.

The dangers of climbing over 20,000 feet; ice, poor oxygen, frost bite, extreme wind chill, changes in temperature from day to evening, dangerous descents, storms, white outs, and more dangers.

My thoughts, climbing is a fun adventurous sport however it is dangerous and important make sure you double check your knots, equipment, have trust worthy climbing partners and experience. Personally for myself, I would not go up Everest, K12, Siula Grande or any other high peaks. Our grand creator of the earth did not intend for humans to be at such elevations. Kudo's to those whom climb the elevations. You will still see me on the rock but I won't be in places of snow and ice.

Thoughts upon reading: Where Men Win Glory

I enjoy reading classics, fiction, nonfiction, biographies, well anything I can get my hands one, except romance novels. I read "Into the Wild" and "Into Thin Air" by Jon Krakauer this last spring. I was extremely impressed with Jon's writing style. He not only has a captivating way of writing but he also does research and presents as much of the facts regarding the story that he is sharing. Granted in the book "Into Thin Air" his intent was to write a story about how Mt. Everest had become so commerical however he ended up being involved in the biggest disaster on Mt. Everest in the history of climbing the moutain.

Thus, I borrowed "Where Men Win Glory: The Odyssey of Pat Tillman" from my friend. I am not far into the book as of yet, however I am learning a lot and have discovered some other books which I will add to my already long list of "To Be Read" books that I would like to read.

Usually, I don't follow politics and details on wars, and will readily admitt I don't tend to talk about politics as I know so little about the topics. I know that even if the war is not on my homeland of America I do know that it can impact my life. The first thing I have learned is that I really should pay closer attention to politics and the reasons behind wars and it goes deeper into history of each country and even my own country.

As I have been reading, I must say that American politicians need to carry a lot of the blame with the recent war in which many of our young military men and women have given up their lives or suffered severe injury either physical or emotional. In the process of reading I have learned that not only did the US support Afghanistan by providing them with weapons but they continued to do so through Soviet occupied Afghanistan, but they supported Iraq with weapons. Which are now being used to kill our American Troops. I could ramble for hours on why this infuriates me. However, I am going to stop because it is raising my blood pressure.

Another thing I learned is that the leader of the Taliban Omar (I forgot his last name) brought Ben Liden back to Afghanistan after Saudi Arabia didn't want him anymore. Omar initially started out doing good deeds, rescuing women and children who where being physically beaten and/or raped by fighting political parties. Thus he stopped some horrible things going on in Afghanistan however, in the process became very hateful and vendictive.

Apparently the US put pressure on Saudi Arabia to expell Ben Liden. Once expelled from his home country (keep in mind he had done some things in Saudi Arabia to the point his family disowned him and he was a very feared man), instead of being a real man decides that he is going to blame the US for his actions. Thus we have the two attacks on the World Trade Center. Clearly a man with severe moral and psychological issues.

Pat Tillman, I should cover him too. I am impressed that first he was willing to give up millions of dollars to serve his country after 9/11. In learning about him in this book, he has the gumption to push himself to his limits and exceed. A great role model for adults and children. Especially little boys. There just doesn't seem to be enough great role models for our youth today.

To end this entry today I am going to dedicate this to my friend Jessie. He was a brilliant young 20 year old. Four years ago he was killed in combat in Afghanistan. Brilliant young man who impacted my life and was a very dear friend. Here's to you Jessie, your life did not go unnoticed. Thanks for serving our country you will always have a special place in my heart.

The Kiss

Recently, I was reminiscing with my dear sister Heather about the one I truly loved an let get away. In reality I broke his heart. He wanted me to move to New York, I was nineteen and scared to leave my little Utah home to go to the big city. We kept in touch, I got married and he told me that I was the one for him and his heart was broken. Though we aren't together he was my first love and our first kiss has and always will be the most memorable kiss I ever had.

William took me to a lovely dinner to Ruby's in Immigration Canyon. It was my first glass of red wine and he knew how to pick a perfect wine with our meal. I remember we had alfredo and a garden salad.

After dinner, William walked back to the car and pulled out this ratty old army blanket. He grabbed my hand and we walked under the half moon in the canyon. He laid the blanket down under a huge tree. we laid down staring at the stars and moon. He began reciting "A Thing of Beauty" by John Keats. When he finished he turned his head toward me, put his hand ever so gently on my chin and pulled me close to his face and then we kissed. The kiss that has imprinted upon my brain as if it happened minutes ago.

Long Time

It has been a while since I blogged. My plan to blog weekly didn't work out so well. My intelligent teenage daughters just went back to school and they tend to require the use of the computer nightly for homework. Thus I have disappeared for a while.

My book buying ban is going well. Eleven days into the ban and I haven't purchased a new book. Which is good as I have so many books that I need to finish reading. There are so many I would like to add to my list also. Must finish ones that I own and books that I have borrowed.

The diet I am on is working out great. I feel so much better eating healthy and pushing myself to work out. Twenty days without sugar. I have a horrible sweet tooth. I could eat so much junk food that it could be severely bad for me. I am sure the holidays, just around the corner, will be tough as I do so love cookies, cake, candy but I shall let myself have a minor snack once the holiday's come around. It will just mean pushing myself to work out more.

Ummmm, a rather boring blog today. I am still asleep. Not sure why. I went to bed late and slept in. I tend to get more sleepy when I actually sleep versus when I don't sleep. I think that is rather odd and then again I am not a normal person.

We do have lovely rain this morning. It did put a damper on my morning bike ride as it is coming down profusely and I didn't want to ride through mud.

Oh, the man ban. Going well. It has given me time to think about what I really want in life and I do know that I need this time to gather my thoughts, better myself and enjoy my dear beautiful children. Really it has opened my eyes to the importance of my lovely family and sweet friends.

Until I pop on again.